I’ve Been Institutionalized

I spent some time in a small town west of Toronto, many decades ago, trying to grow up (still working on the ‘growing up’ although I seem have the ‘growing old’ down pat). In this town is a correctional institute. I am currently attending an educational institute.

The word ‘institute’ may be defined as a society or organization having a common factor. Many people are gathered in one place, literal or figurative, with an underlying universal attention to a common goal.

© victorperezp.com

© victorperezp.com

Institute may also be defined as ‘community’. Community may be defined as ‘culture’. Culture may be defined as the attitude and behaviour characteristic of a particular social group.

After almost half a century on this planet, I decided to step onto a new planet; launch myself out of my known universe and into a new culture. What I have learned will sustain me forever. I learned that we are ‘too comfortable’ in our boxes; we are all afraid of new things, yet we are all strong enough to try. I have built strong relationships with people one-third my age, given in to ‘not knowing’, and embraced experience and learning.

Life begins at the very edge of our comfort zone. Life expands when we embrace strange new worlds. Life explodes when we take ‘fear’ out of our vocabulary.

~peace~

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Change is Good? Change is Bad? Maybe

Yesterday, I received a distress call from someone, very close to my heart, who is experiencing changes in his life that are, for him, entirely unique.4_961_Tao&Zen

So change is bad? Change is good? Maybe …

An old farmer worked his fields to support his family and one morning discovered his horse had run away. His neighbours gathered around him, clucking and offering condolences. “How terrible for you”, they said.

“Maybe” was his simple reply.

The next morning his mare returned, bringing with her four wild horses. “What a wonderful stroke of luck”, cheered his neighbours.

“Maybe”, said the old man.

When trying to ride one of the wild horses, the farmer’s son was thrown and broke his leg. “Oh, how dreadful”, his neighbours lamented.

“Maybe”, the old farmer shrugged.

The following week, the army came to the village to conscript young men to take to war but the farmer’s son, with his broken leg, was left behind. The neighbours gathered to congratulate the farmer on his family’s good fortune.

“Maybe”

Trust that everything that happens has a purpose and brings us to be who we are today.

~ peace ~

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Conquer Your Nemesis ~ Ego and Compassion

Some days, the shortest words in the English language are the hardest to say: I’m sorry, I was wrong, I love you, thank you …

Lately, I’ve been struggling with my ego. It dons a trench coat and dark glasses, turning my curiosity into suspicion. Its sneaky moves wrestle me away from peaceful introspection and push me toward presumption, drag me into traps of assumption, fill me with anxiety, and sucker-punch me into acts of manipulation.

Ego thrives on fear, anxiety, and ignorance. Fear of being forgotten, disregarded, unworthy, or unloved. Anxiety borne of mis-perceived judgments. Ignorance in seeing things as we imagine them to be, rather than as they are. We send out tendrils of anger to those who, we feel, have wronged us. Yet by doing so, we lose touch with the truth they, too, are struggling. We do our Self a great disservice by adding to their burden.

“The ego is your enemy, not your friend. It is the ego that gives you wounds and hurts you. It is the ego that makes you violent, angry, jealous, competitive. It is the ego that is continuously comparing and feeling miserable” ~ Osho ~

I am grateful for missteps; they send me stumbling forward into greater understanding and growth. By letting go of expectations, judgments, and assumptions, I take myself out of others’ equations and see things as they really are; not about ‘me’ at all.

At that moment of doubt and fear, switch over to compassion. Easing others’ burdens through loving kindness is the greatest gift you give to them, and to yourself.  Seeing things with love and compassion won’t change reality but it will improve your perception of it.

~peace~

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Every Day is New Year’s Day

photoPenThe sound of the spine cracking. The fresh scent of virgin paper. One of the best things about the New Year is the empty pages of a new day-timer (something I won’t relinquish despite our digital age).

New Year’s Day is symbolic of new beginnings, fresh starts, resolutions for change. It’s a day to open your heart and mind to promise and possibility, to write your own story on the virgin pages of your life. Step off the edge. Be fascinated. Stay curious. Discover new joy.

Travel into the New Year carrying kindness and wisdom; share it freely. Listen closely and speak mindfully. Smile when no one is looking. Redefine prosperity. Bask in the light that others bring into your life; recognize that you will learn from everyone.

Appreciate that Now is the only moment in which we live. Acknowledge and respect the negative; warmly embrace the positive.

If you make only one resolution for 2013, let it be that you live each day as New Year’s Day.

~ peace ~

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Dance to the Music You Hear Right Now

Some days are great; filled with laughter, great food, and comfortable shoes.

Some days are not so great; filled with regret, heartburn, and blisters.

But does that make life any less … life? We are continuously presented with joys and challenges. Side-splitting laughter may slay you and random kindness might tumble into your day. Muddy communication between friends, failed logic, and frustration may reign supreme.

Slow Down

Life around us moves at breakneck speed and we are compelled along; if we stop for a moment, competitors will exploit our weakness. This misconception seduces us into believing that speed conquers. The trouble with racing through the present moments, thinking only of those yet to come, is that all we see is peripheral. It is impossible to enjoy breakfast when your mind is busy imagining dinner. Relish the meal you are eating.

Pay Attention

One of the kindest gifts you can bestow, upon others and upon yourself, is unwavering attention. Being present within each moment allows for understanding, compassion, and true communication. It is also one of the most challenging, forgoing the distractions of “I’m so busy and have so much left to do today” to focus on that present moment. Breathe, connect, and listen.

Question Everything

Ask. Examine. Query. Wonder. Look for answers in every moment.
Being open to understanding, without judgement, allows us to learn about ourselves and about others. Take time to discover from where your anger, resentment, confusion and joy comes through honest examination. Old simmering anger can bubble over and impose itself, ruining the start of a fresh, new day. Recognize it, question it, and forgive it.

You can not dance to music that has yet to written.
Dance to the music you hear right now.

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How I Let Real Life Totally Mess Up My Social Media

I can roll my tongue. I can write with both hands. I can read backwards and upside down. But I can’t do a cartwheel.

I’ve learned that there are many things to which we are predisposed ~ things of which we are, genetically, capable. Yet, as individuals, we have the ability to adapt and accept. We learn, unlearn, relearn and this is, I believe, is what makes us intelligent. What makes us human.

As an introvert, this ‘social media thang’ is a boon to me. It opened up opportunities to meet, and truly connect, with others whom I would otherwise never have had such opportunity. But, as with many boons, it came at a cost. That cost was my time.

Time, as you know, is relative. When you’re late, time is of the essence. When you’re waiting, time is interminable. Were you to truly examine ‘your time’ (and how it really matters to You), it becomes less relative and much more intimate. The time that I had to learn and discover and grow became scarcer. So I decided to let Real Life totally mess up my Social Media.

I shut off my computer. I opened the books I’ve been meaning to read. I fired up the stove. I went outside and, sloughing off (as best I can) my introversion, I focused on and followed my heart. Out there avec les masses. I prefer to do nothing by halves. Inherently passionate when I decide on anything, I learned to snowboard when already (by most accounts) too old to do it and, now, do it very well. I hope that, in my newest pursuits, I will fare as well.

I am studying Tibetan Buddhism. Following my passion for food, I’ll be working on my Chef papers. I spend time on yoga and meditation every day. I take time to read, and learn from, my Social Media friends’ posts and thoughts. I allowed Real Life to get in the way of engaging, as I once did, on social media platforms.

Social media is an extraordinary medium for connecting. I am honoured to have been accepted by and to have connected with so many insightful and inspiring individuals.

I still can’t do a cartwheel. But there’s time.

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Femurs and Philanthropy: A Legacy of Kindness

Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on Earth
~ Muhammad Ali ~

Margaret Mead was a cultural anthropologist born at the turn of the 20th century who, throughout her 77 years on the planet, made remarkable contributions to the understanding of what, and why, we humans do the things we do. She was once asked by an interviewer: “What is the first sign you look for to tell you more about an ancient civilization?” (assuming Mead would suggest a broken pot or a primitive tool).

Her answer was surprising: a healed femur

Ms. Mead elaborated: “When someone breaks a femur, they can’t survive to hunt, fish or escape enemies unless they have help from someone else. Thus, a healed femur indicates that someone else helped that person, rather than abandoning them and saving themselves. Isn’t that what we in philanthropy are all about? Healing femurs of one sort or another?”

You give but little when you give of your possessions.
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give
~ Kahlil Gibran ~

People’s time is a precious resource. In 2010, nearly 63 million volunteered their time, at least once, to or through a philanthropic organization. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the annual personal contribution is 52 hours or 3.3 billion total hours, translating to the potential of over $3 trillion of pecuniary value in the US alone.

One organization that is taking the commitment to volunteerism to a new level is the Global Volunteer Network (GVN) whose mission is to connect people with communities in need. Colin Salisbury, who launched the GVN in late 2000, discovered that many volunteer opportunities were often limiting and expensive. Salisbury had witnessed the positive effect that volunteer contributions had on helping local organizations attain their goals and, to date, the GVN provides volunteer programs in 21 countries throughout South America, Africa, and Asia.

Over the past decade, the GVN has placed over 15,000 volunteers and, aligning with the concept of ‘local solutions to local problems’, they have built solid ties with grassroots organizations across the globe. By connecting with local community organizations, international volunteers hit the ground running, providing a wealth of resources and experience and are dedicated to the success of the local partners’ projects. The GVN Foundation has been endorsed by Bill Gates and has Special Consultative Status with the UN Economic and Social Council.

Eat So They Can: No one Likes to Dine Alone

The perfect storm may very well be the cycle of poverty. Extreme poverty is our number one cause of hunger and malnutrition which result in severely diminished physical health and intellectual acuity. It lowers levels of energy to such degrees that the hungry lose the capacity to learn and to work, thus perpetuating the cycle of poverty. There are 925 million people on the planet who suffer from hunger, many from the most lethal form of malnutrition: Protein-Energy Malnutrition (PEM), essentially a lack of the most basic protein and calories to survive.

According to the World Health Organization, hunger is the single gravest threat to the world’s public health, affecting close to 14% of our global population.

~ Nobody can do Everything. But Everyone Can do Something ~

Eat So They Can is an international fundraiser inviting citizens of the world to one Huge Dinner Party!

Right this minute, somewhere in your town and perhaps in your own home, people are gathering with friends and family to share a meal. Right this minute, these people can be helping to stop poverty. The funds raised from the Eat So They Can campaign will go towards supporting orphaned and vulnerable children and to women’s empowerment projects in Africa, Asia and the Americas. We lose more than six million of our children each year to hunger and we can help them.

In our society of relative affluence, most have never known extreme poverty. Hunger means forgetting your lunch and managing on that granola bar you found in your desk until dinner. The global statistics on poverty may seem daunting and distant; distant facts about people in distance places. It’s time to have dinner in your community; the world is your community.

The smallest action is worth a fortune of intentions ~ good intentions do not feed the hungry. All is takes is for each of us to donate the cost of a dessert or a bottle of wine. You don’t have to do everything; simply, do something. At your next dinner party or get together, open up your laptop and invite your friends and family to make a difference!

Please visit Eat So They Can and share a little of your abundance.

If you think you are too small to be effective,
you have never been in bed with a mosquito
~ Betty Reese ~

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